Blog

Managing Anxiety in Grief- Six Series- Episode 2- Recurrent Thoughts of Loss- Labeling

The experience of constant thoughts of the loss continues as we grieve.  These could be details of the loss itself, or memories of what life was like before the loss, or thoughts about actions we did or did not take that in our mind could have changed the outcome of the loss.  Or it could be recurrent thoughts of an...[ read more ]

Managing Anxiety in Grief – Six Series- Episode 1- Recurrent Thoughts of Loss – Heart Breathing

One thing I’ve learned from others who are grieving and in my own grief is that anxiety seems to magnify at this hard time. It manifests in many ways, and one that is particularly painful comes in the form of recurrent thoughts of the loss. These distressing thoughts play over and over again in our heads, making it hard to...[ read more ]

Leaning into Grief and Anxiety

Leaning into Grief and Anxiety As we continue to experience personal losses from the pandemic, and witness the social unrest from heinous violent acts, grief and anxiety are present everywhere we turn. The uncertainty, lack of ability to plan and expect, loss of connection with others, loss of life for some and ability to get basic survival needs met, and...[ read more ]

5 Things I Knew and am Relearning Freshly in Grief

In my practice helping people with grief, I work with my clients’ thoughts, feelings and behaviors experienced due to loss. Much of the time my understanding of grief comes from other grief specialists’ research and literature, lectures, podcasts, workshops, my own grief experience or from clients. Now having lost my dad just recently, I’m freshly here, and this time noting...[ read more ]

Handling Time Distortion with COVID-19 Restrictions- What Day Is It?

I’m hearing so many comments about the lost perception of time lately.  “I don’t know what day it is.” “Was that two days ago or two weeks ago?” “I feel like it’s Groundhog Day,” (alluding to the movie when actor Bill Murray’s character experiences the same day repeatedly). We may have felt this before when we were on vacation or...[ read more ]

Tired Yet? Coping with Compassion Fatigue from COVID-19

The thoughts and feelings rising from this current pandemic can be so exhausting.  There is many a day I get to the point of feeling completely and utterly spent, drained, “done.”  The strain of tending to family members, friends, clients, random people in the public.  Sometimes you are just so tired of caring about it, tired of talking about it,...[ read more ]

Why Avoiding Worry Leads to More Worrying

Avoidance or escapist behavior (doing a different behavior, or not doing something so we can avoid the feelings of fear, sadness, anger, shame) is a common reaction to a worry or stress. It serves as a protective function, the brain's way of averting danger or threat. An example is deciding to watch a show on Netflix instead of working on...[ read more ]

Responses to COVID 19: Helping Yourself Cope

This pandemic has been challenging for us in so many ways.  Our reality has shifted and we find ourselves thinking and feeling things that are difficult to understand. Trauma expert Dr. Bessel van der Kolk likens it to reactions he’s seen in trauma survivors.  For some of us, due to our personal histories or current situations this pandemic can be...[ read more ]

Acknowledging Loss

We are so focused on acquiring...get this, take on that, pursue this, gain that. What about the loss that is inevitable in our lives? Small losses, if not grieved, are cumulative and influence how we handle future losses. Our culture currently does not address loss, does not teach us how to grieve. It is secret...we are just quietly supposed to...[ read more ]

Don’t Worry, Be Happy?

Well, not exactly. According to social psychologist and "father" of thought suppression David Wagner, the more we try not to think of something, the more we think of it. In his 1987 "white bear" experiment, he showed a picture of a polar bear to a group of participants and then had them track their thoughts but avoid thinking of the...[ read more ]


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